This review will contain spoilers, anything going beyond the scope of the episode will be done in white text and will be preceded by *Spoiler*, episode spoilers will not be prefaced.
Last week was brutal. I knew it was coming and it was still brutal. Today we’ll see the aftermath of the Red Wedding but don’t forget that Dany also sacked Yunkai and Joffrey is set to be married soon. The Red Wedding was so powerful it’s hard to remember there are still a lot of story lines in intense places.
The Good
- Gods I didn’t think they’d start so brutally but showing RobbWind reminds us how awful last week really was.
- Switching to King’s Landing right after the Stark slaughter is a great juxtaposition. It was also really nice to see Sansa enjoying her life even married to Tyrion.
- Joffrey is as giddy as a school boy and a sick fuck combined. So perfectly great to hate.
- I know I should hate Tywin but I can’t. Putting Joffrey in his place makes him extra awesome. Tyrion lays out why for us.
- The more Hodor the better. Even yelling down a well at the Night Fort. I’ve also missed a lot of stories from the books so Bran telling the story of the Rat Cook made me especially happy. *Spoiler* Wouldn’t mind a Frey Pie right about now.
- Few better words than “the Blackfish escaped.” The biggest badass in the riverlands on the loose.
- And ladies and gentlemen please remember today as the day you found out that the man tormenting Theon is Roose Bolton’s son, Ramsey.
- Sam the Slayer and Bran the Warg! Also Jojen, you’re a creeper.
- At least Theon’s sister is more loyal than his dad.
- This has been “Who Grew Up Worse” with Davos and Gendry.
- Tyrion is the last person I want to try and keep up with if wine is involved.
- GAD DAMN Arya!!!!!!!!!! Valar Mohgulis.
- I want a new show. I want Arya and Sandor Seek Revenge! Each episode they hunt and murder Freys and Boltons while playing The Rains of Castamere.
- Something about Davos…I just love me an Onion Knight. Also stop burning shit Melisandre, you damn pyro.
- Welcome home Jaime, nobody knows who you are without your white cloak.
- Looks like Yunkai is protected by the Dragon now.
- I just want to hear someone say “the North remembers” so badly. So close yet so far.
- Hey sonny boy I treated you like shit all your life because I decided I couldn’t murder a baby Lannister.-Parenting from Tywin
- I really didn’t need so much about Theon’s lost cock.
- *Spoiler* Reek Reek it rhymes with meek. You must remember your name.
- *Spoiler* Where the fuck is Cold Hands?
- Balon Greyjoy was sent a letter and present containing a penis. That is some fucked up shit. “Well he was a dipshit and now he’s got no cock so what good is he?” Father of the Year right there.
- Gods Ygriite, 3 arrows? Not cool.
- *Spoiler* Woah woah woah we don’t name children until their second name day north of the Wall!
Solid episode but after last week there is nothing they could have done to live up to the Red Wedding. Everything is just setting up the start of Season 4. Jon and Sam back at the Wall. Jaime back in the capitol. Stannis changing plans. Yara heading to save Theon from Roose Bolton’s bastard. Next season already has a whole lot to do just from this episode.
This season has been a wild ride and I’m ready to go back and watch it all again. We’ve got a long long while before we head back to Westeros.