The Wizeguy: Gotta Post Fast

My brain doesn’t seem to know how to process what it’s just seen. It’s registering that my eyes and ears have detected information, but what they’re detecting just seems to contradict itself so it’s like nothing was actually there. Something simultaneously over-the-top and flat at the same. Too much happening while at the same time nothing is happening. It’s too bright and yet dull. This trailer is like staring at a paradox. I’m confused, and I think I need to lie on the floor and stare at the ceiling for a while. Between this and Dora, I don’t even know what reality is these days?

This movie feels like a weird time displaced artifact of 1995, complete with a manic Jim Carrey, the completely out of place use of Gangsta’s Paradise, and the “THE VIDEO GAME GETS REAL” vibe of the whole thing. It’s like from an alternate reality where the Super Mario Bros. movie was a mega hit and Sega, desperate to respond to Nintendo’s success, cranked out this thing. I can’t look away.

Sonic the Hedgehog comes out on Nov. 8.

-Dagobot

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